It was 6.00 in the evening, the weather was blustery and my hands were a bit clammy. I was rushing to my GRE class which is about 10km away from my house. A sort of soporific routine at college had made my day. As I ride my scooter, there is this feeling of lethargy in my mind, which constantly threatens me and after hours of hanging in there, my brain finally surrenders and goes adrift. Then a duration of long, pointless and random thoughts start flowing which is completely absurd and it is my instincts that take me to my destination quite dangerously.
I sometimes wonder what the point is in socializing with people, who are mostly self-centered; to while away time and laugh? or bare my heart out to them and later regret as to why I actually confided in them? or for selfish personal motives of extracting help from them when in need? or lend a ear to their sob stories stoking their expectation of becoming their conscience-keeper. Unfortunately for me, I have not been able to throw some light on it as yet. Recently, I came across two people who have become the "thickest" of friends (of the opposite sex, that is). This guy here, a person who very frequently ribs others about having female friends, developed a close acquaintance with a girl who used to have this aversion to men. May be their association has a cathartic effect of dispelling their mental aberration. Their very expressions and actions make me wonder how stupid it is and how perspectives and ideologies change when it comes to oneself, with respect to how they look at others. I certainly do mind socializing with such people. There is this group of people who are carefree and do whatever they feel like doing pretty gleefully without even noticing the fact that they emanate a sophomoric radiation which makes others feel how bird-brained they are; all what they do make you think whether the problem is really with them or is it because you feel you have an old head on young shoulders. But on top of all this, they too are people who have almost similar sized brains, but the thoughts that are crafted in them might be unacceptable to others and may be even contradictory.
A different form of continuous stream of thought which often keeps flowing in my 'not-so-seasoned' brain is actually a dilemma which I would like to clarify with all the readers. I do not have any slightest idea how I came up with this thing, but if we think about it, the answer might actually be a bit debatable. I ruminate frequently that most of the time the goal set by man becomes just a tool and not a destination; how people try to attain greater heights as they prosper which was previously thought to be out of reach. A very valid point worth giving a thought.
So quite amusingly, all these thoughts randomly get convoluted in me and suddenly I hit the brakes so hard as the signal turns red, that I feel as if I just freely-fell from space with my heart pounding so hard and realize how mundane it was thinking about such piffling thoughts. Finally, after reaching the class, a small pump of hands with my friends, makes me smirk with a quite unnoticeable change of attitude.
After spending hours on this directionless blog, my inner conscience asks me what the point was in writing this and I sit there in front of the computer thinking about it. Abstruse isn't it?.........
